Dubai: She’s 41 and a single mum in Pakistan. Every morning Farheen Ishtiaq dresses up like a man to run a small corner shop on a busy street in Lahore. Why? To avoid unwanted stares and catcalls that a woman would get in Anarkali Bazaar, a congested marketplace in the heart of the city.
###
On February 11, Ishtiaq and her little shop became famous on social media.
######
Ishtiaq who belongs to Karachi, has no family except a nine-year-old daughter. She looks after her child single-handedly. Ishtiaq told Gulf News her story about how a decision to marry someone her parents did not approve of, changed the course of her life.
###
“In 2010, I chose to get married to someone who was not the same ethnicity as me as and my parents did not accept it. It was an extremely difficult time,” she said.
###
Soon after, she got pregnant. As if things were not hard enough, Ishtiaq’s husband left her while she was pregnant.
###
“I gave birth at a hospital without any family support. I had to have an operation done and I told the doctors, ‘if I die, please give my daughter to my parents’,” she said.
###
After her daughter, Rida Zahra, was born, Ishtiaq decided to let go of the past and focus on raising her as a single parent. Her daughter is currently nine years old.
###
“My only focus was to provide for her and give her a better life than what I had,” she said.
###
More than 850 kilometres away from Karachi, Ishtiaq had a friend in the city of Multan in Punjab, she decided to give Zahra to her, who took care of her newborn for a year and a half.
###
“I could not work and take care of her at the same time and I was barely making money,” she said.
###
Ishtiaq was working as a waitress at the time.
###
When her friend could no longer take care of Zahra, Ishtiaq found herself back at her parent’s doorstep.
###
“I told them that if they no longer want me as a daughter it is fine but they should not cut connections with their granddaughter and they kept her for four years,” she said.
###
From Karachi to Lahore
###
During this time, Ishtiaq hustled to make some money and planned a permanent solution to stay with her daughter.
###
“Someone told me that there is a girl’s hostel in Lahore where I could safely live with my daughter and work at the same time and I decided to go there,” she added.
######
Saying that it can be difficult for women to stay on their own in Pakistan, she added that ensuring a safe place to live was crucial for Ishtiaq and her daughter. She said: “I decided to pack everything and take my daughter to live with her in Lahore.”
###
She was faced with more difficulties in the new city.
###
“The city was new and I found it difficult to adjust. I was also living and working around Anarkali Bazaar,” she said.
###
Anarkali Bazaar is a congested marketplace and one of the most visited places in Lahore.
######
In a highly male dominated and patriarchal society like Pakistan’s, it’s common for women to be subject to harassment in public.
###
Women working in male centred fields can constantly get harassed with gazes, cat calls and in more extreme instances, physical and sexual abuse.
###
Ishtiaq started preparing snacks like samosas and chips and selling them on a hawker basket around the busy streets but invariably got harassed.
###
“The place is such that a woman cannot do so in peace,” said a frustrated Ishtiaq.
###
Wardrobe change
###
She decided to start dressing as man to avoid unwanted stares and cat calls.
###
I was always a tomboy and I thought it would be a good solution. From a business point of view, it was needed,” she said.
###
Talking about how people received it, she said: “People couldn’t figure out that I was a woman besides those who knew me in the bazaar”, she said.
###
She started operating on the streets of Lahore with the pseudonym, Ali.
######
After making some money from selling items on foot, she opened a tuck shop (a small corner shop) where Zahra could be by her side.
###
“I could work and keep my daughter beside me and I never want to separate from her again,” she said.
###
After coming back from school, Zahra joins her mother at the tuck shop to help with the business.
###
“She [Zahra] has never questioned why I dress this way. She knows exactly why,” she said.
###
In her spare time, before the shop opens in the mornings, Ishtiaq drives an Uber using her bike, giving rides to women.
###
Social media reaction
###
Ishtiaq’s story was recently shared online as she is still struggling with debt.
###
A student, Zain ul Hassan, belonging to Sheikhupura saw one such post on Facebook and decided to share it on his Twitter account.
###
Hassan studies at a university in Lahore near where Ishtiaq has her corner shop. Talking to Gulf News, the 19-year-old said: “I decided to go and meet her. I saw the struggles she is going through and I just want people to help her.”
###
Learning about Ishtiaq’s story, Hassan said that she is inspirational. “I request people to help support such people who are fighting society itself in Pakistan,” he added.
###